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Wednesday, March 30, 2011

March 31, 1985

I once asked my hot high school biology teacher (skyline alums know exactly who I’m speaking of) when aging stopped being a good thing. Without batting a hot eyelash he said 26. His rationale made sense; 25 is the last time there is a perk to aging. You get the ability to rent a car and insurance rates go down, so that pretty much puts and end to things of that nature. He also told me that after 25 my body would start to ache for no good reason (check!), I would be tired all the time (double check!) and there would be nothing left to look forward to. Deyle was always a downer so I hope the last part isn’t true, but thus far he’s 2-1!

Well kiddos, tomorrow marks the start of my downhill slope. It’s no longer fun for me to age. Maybe someone will gift me some Tory Burch flats to ease the pain. They’re probably better for my knees than those heels anyhow.
5 hours ago

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

You can run, you can hide, but you can't escape the office windows!

If I could travel back to the 9th grade and talk to 15 year old Kirsten, I would tell her one thing:
 
“When you’re 25 years old, you will have a job that will allow you to listen to boy bands for 8 hours a day.”
 
Holy cow! Can you imagine how excited that would have made me? It would have made all of those awkward/traumatic teen years so much more bearable!
 
“What’s that Erin [last name omitted]? You think I’m a loser because I have never kissed a boy? Well I don’t care what you think because when I grow up I will get to listen to NSYNC and Backstreet Boys all day long while you will be working at Walmart, married to some sick white trash guy who wears affliction all the time because you peaked in high school!”
 
(sidenote: Teenage Kirsten knew about affliction because I would also warn her about that fashion nightmare)
 
(sidenote #2: I don’t know where Erin [last name omitted] really is these days, but I assume I am fairly accurate on that…at least I truly hope that I am…)
 
And that is what I do ladies and gents. I have created a Backstreet Boys station and Pandora and I listen to the best of the mid to late 90’s all day at work. Everything from 98 degrees to Mariah Carey dazzles my ear drums while I process payroll. It. Is. Glorious! The downside is that I might have just experienced the downside of tapping into my teen years. Today at work I was standing at my desk dancing to “Escape” by Enrique Iglesias. I suddenly realized that my office blinds were open and that the stylists at the salon next door could see directly into my office windows. They could see me and they did. I stopped my dancing, sat back down in my wheelie chair and got back to payroll. At least Erin [last name omitted] doesn’t work at the salon next door.
 
 
 
 

Saturday, March 19, 2011

Benny & The Nighty-Q

Last night I mixed bennys & nighty-Q and lived to tell the tale! For those of you who are not hip to my OTC drug names:

Bennys= Benadryl 
Nighty-Q= nyquil 

I need you all to just calm down! Before you judge just listen to my reasoning! I have this date tonight and I have had this awful cough for the last 10ish days. I cant be hacking up a lung on a date, so obviously I needed nighty-q. Then last night I was at dinner with Mary and Amanda. We got this delicious dessert called chocolate decadence. 2 bites into it I remembered that I'm allergic to chocolate. Not to say I forget my allergies, but I'm usually fine unless its super rich or dark. Chocolate decadence sounds rich and I wasn't about to take any chances! I spun into panic mode and started freaking out that I might get hives. I took the bennys as preventative measure. I mean obviously it was totally necessary. 

Before you start calling me mean druggy names, I want to assure you that I consulted google before mixing them and google said it "could be done but was not advisable" See, that means it's totally fine! 

The best part of my OTC cocktail was the text I got from Amanda this morning: "Please bless that you are still alive after your many mixes and also that you are hive free!"

Awwww! She's such a sweet friend to be concerned! Indeed I am hive free and still breathing. Not advisable? What does that really even mean? I mean, I have done plenty of things against the advice of others and I'm fine! 

Wish me luck on the date!