The ol' hike n' dance

Dear father and son that encountered me on my hike up millcreek,
 
I would like to formally apologize for what you walked up on last night. You see, I had some endorphins pumping through my system having recently reached a very nice overlook of the Salt Lake Valley. I had also just changed my ipod over to Ellie Goulding. If you are familiar with Ellie Goulding then you understand that her music is impossible to not dance to. The aforementioned factors explain why, on the downhill portion of my hike, I was doing a little half hike/half dance down. If it is any consolation, I assure you that moment was as awkward for me as it was for you. Please accept my apology and do not let that event deter you from that hike again. It really is a lovely hike.
 
Sincerely,
Kirsten aka the weird girl you saw dancing on her hike up Millcreek canyon

Ahhh! The single life...

I know most of you that read my blog are murried and I don’t mean to make ya’ll jelly or anything, but there are some serious perks to the single life! I mean, sure I have to deal with the crippling insecurities that come with casual dating, but there are a few perks too. I use the term “casual dating” loosely as I truly believe it is the most ironic of all oxy morons. There is absolutely nothing casual about the dating world, ever! Take it from someone who regularly spends hours getting ready just to go eat a snow cone and pretend to care about some dude’s intramural softball team, the Blue Balls. I don’t care and I don’t think your team name is clever. It’s just gross and immature. Oh, and the “casual” t-shirt and jeans combo generally takes about 45 minutes and several changes to pick out. What part of that sounds casual you guys? I beg of you to tell me! People who say that casual dating is fun are lying to you. Get real! But I digress….
 
Back to the perks….there are some! It donned on me last weekend when I decided to spend my Saturday night doing laundry, eating takeout and watching “From Prada to Nada”, that there are some perks to not having anyone else around. That night was one of them. It was pretty awesome to do nothing and watch a bad movie while eating delicious food. It got me thinking about other perks….
 
// I can put egg whites on my face as a mask to get rid of my zits and no one has to know...except you guys now.  
// I have a shoe closet! A closet just for shoes! It’s like opening the door to nirvana every morning and I don’t have to share that space with anyone!
// I get to eat dinner in my bed pretty much every night.
// I can consume 4 cans of diet coke in one hour and no one tells me I’m an addict or that it is disgusting…It’s not and I’m not, you guys!
// I get to have impromptu dance parties in my room as often as I like!
// I can opt to drink out of a mason jar just because I like to, and no one questions me…I don’t use none of them fancy glasses unless company is over!
// I can tell someone I have to get home to do some housework when really I am going home to lay in bed with my pants off.
// I get to let my really loud, obnoxious laugh ring through the air while I watch “Happy Endings”…sans pants and sans shame.
// I can hold off on texting a guy back because I want to seem busy…allow me to reiterate that this is done on a night when I’ve spent the evening laying around pantsless.
// I get to come home on a hot afternoon, take my pants off and eat ice cream while I pray for cooler weather.
// I don’t have to wear pants around the house, like, ever!
 
Are you guys totes jelly of my life? You should be!

Good Quote by an Amazing Man

"It is funny how mortals always picture us as putting things into their minds: in reality our best work is done by keeping things out." 
— C.S. Lewis (The Screwtape Letters)

Saturday is a special day...it's the day I go to the pool!

I belong at the pool. I live for Saturday afternoons at Stiener's. Today, I bring you my never-shared-before, thoughts from the pool:

- Would it be totally weird of me to ask the stranger to trade magazines with me when she's done?
- Oh good! The lunatic fringe crew is here (in reference to the tatted hipsters all in black with wayfarers on as they arrive at the pool...it's 95 out here. You can take the black off, you tools!)
- I want a soft pretzel, but I don't want to bloat (my vanity overcame my craving)
- Pretty sure its not okay for a married dude to be alone at the pool, sitting next to the single girls, eyeing us through his oakleys...we know you're doing it. They aren't that dark.
- So...very....sweaty!
- Holy crap! That girl is in sweat pants! You could not pay me to be in sweat pants right now! 
- I want ice cream.
- I need a nap (and I then accidentally took one)
- Stephen Coletti is such a fool! Who breaks up with LC AND Kristin Cavalleri?!
- Kyle Howard is an even bigger fool! Breaking up with LC because he wants to be the next Di Niro? Who picks Di Niro as their inspiration? And no one knows who you are!
- Gross! Pool of sweat in my belly button. Eeeeeeew! 
- Too...freaking...hot....must...leave...

And there you have it. My day at the pool ladies and gents. 

Best. Weeks. Ever.

Great things are happening y'all! I won't go into giddy details, but the last two weeks have been absolutely tops! (I'm trying to incorporate british words into my vocab again...but I won't add u's to words. I hate favourite colours!) so many people have made my weeks grand but I'm just going to stick with the highlights: 

First of all, Taking Back Sunday put on one of the best shows I've ever seen! For the record, I did not let their music talk me into anything. I couldn't hear until 1pm the next day, I haven't sweat that much in years and the little girls in front of us didn't know what a keytar was...but that show was incredible and the company was too! (you can't tell but Adam was crazy close to us here)


Next, on Friday one of my oldest friends got married! It was a lovely dinner with lovely dancing and lovely friends. Congrats to Sars and Arni-Elei! I love you guys! 


Now the most exciting news of all! Notice how Amanda is on the verge of popping in the above picture? Well she did! Baby boi was born about a month early but he was healthy and adorbs!! I loved snuggling him at the hospital and I can't wait to snuggle him for years to come! I love you Amanda, B and Baby B! I am soooo lucky to know you guys!

Summer School

Alright class, its time for a pop quiz! It’s a multiple choice and the answers will be given at the end of this blog entry. You have 4 minutes to complete this quiz and no notes or calculators may be used. Your time begins NOW!
 
 
1.  Do you know who is awesome?

A. Oprah
B. Serena Williams
C. Nickelback
D. Taking Back Sunday
 
2. In college I once made the decision to kiss a frat boy based on the lyrics to which song:

A. “A decade under the influence” – TBS (Anyone will do tonight. Close your eyes just settle)
B. “We belong together” – Mariah Carey (Come back, baby because we belong together)
C. “Bubbly” – Colbie Caillet (You make me smile. Please stay for a while now)
D. “Figured you out” – Nickelback (Now I know who you are. It wasn’t that hard. To figure you out)
 
3. What concert am I going to tonight?

A. Nickelback
B. Taking Back Sunday
C. Yo Gabba Gabba
D. Manhiem Steamroller
 
4. Will I make the same decision I made 7 years ago, tonight (refer to question 2)?

A. Absolutely! You never learn from your mistakes.
B. No Way! You have way too much self respect now.
C. There’s a pretty good chance. It wasn’t really that poor of a decision.
D. Only time will tell…but you certainly can’t rule anything out.
 
Times up! Put your pens down. I will now give you the correct answers:
 
1. D. Taking Back Sunday. If you answered Nickelback, I get to kick you swiftly in the face.
2. A. A Decade Under the Influence. Those lyrics literally went through my head. Bummer for him if he reads this blog and finds out that I did that. Sorry, man. I was in a really weird place in life. Also, if you answered Nickelback to that one, I get to kick you in the face until you bleed.
3. B. Taking Back Sunday. I am so stoked!! I mean, I once allowed them to talk me into kissing someone. Obvs I am a big fan! Again, if Nickelback was your answer, I am no longer your friend. Facebook deleted and everything!
4. D. Only time will tell….but I certainly can’t rule anything out. A lady never kisses and tells so I would never post about that on here…unless you are the aforementioned frat boy (sorry again!) so if you want to know, you will just have to text me tomorrow to find out!
 
 
 

It's a sales job

I was out late on Saturday…late for me meaning past 11:00pm. I wasn’t even out for one of the 2 good reasons to stay up past midnight, but that is beside the point. I guess my late night must have made things a little wonky because at some point around 1:30ish, I actually thought it relevant to google, “annual income for a stripper”. Dead serious guys. I don’t remember why I was looking that up and I swear I wasn’t on anything, but I just needed to know in that moment how much money strippers make.  I learned that it can be upwards of $300K if you’re good at your stripping ways and stay off the drugs. But this little paragraph is what really caught my eye:

 
 
It’s a sales job guys, not a dancing job, so go to school so you can make sure you know how to best use your daddy issues to get the most tips. Dolla, dolla bill ya’ll!
 
P.S. It was apparently at 1:22 am. Thanks, iPhone for documenting my momentary lapse in judgment.
 
P.P.S. I was home alone in bed, watching TV when I felt the need to look this up so I really just have no solid explanation for why I felt this information was pertinent.
 
P.P.P.S. If you are curious as to what the 2 good reasons to stay up past midnight are, just shoot me a text and I will elaborate.